Chapter 2: Age of Accountability Part 1

| Part 1: My Analogy | Part 2: My Reality |

Children of Grievous Sinners

“18 is the new 8!”

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[Scene 1: Gary, Indiana. Bishop’s office, LDS meetinghouse, February 2018. Bishop Robinson, a middle-aged man who has served the church selflessly since the day he was baptized as an eight-year-old, is meeting with an energetic and well-spoken girl named Breslen Simmons, who is about to turn eight herself. Her proud parents slide their chairs back to show Breslen that she is the center of attention here. Bishop Robinson takes off his reading glasses and leans back in his chair]

Bishop: Hi Breslen – you look so pretty in your new dress!

Breslen: Thank you Bishop.

Bishop: I’ve never seen a dress with a gear logo – must be a new brand name I’ve never heard of.

Breslen: Nope, it’s not a designer brand – Mierren and I actually drew the logos ourselves!

Bishop: Yes, I know Mierren, she’s a very…um…interesting girl.

Breslen: Well we’re best friends – and we’re going to draw them onto all of our dresses.

Bishop: OK, well that’s all very intriguing. But let’s get to the point. So you want to be baptized?

Breslen: Yep, I really do!

Bishop: Great! As I mentioned to you last week, the bishop always holds a baptismal interview with those who want to be baptized. It’s one of my favorite parts of my role as bishop. Are you ready?

Breslen: I sure am! At least I think so…as long as the questions aren’t too hard!

Bishop: Well, I’m sure you’ll do fine. So here we go: As you know, baptism represents a big, lifelong commitment – it’s a lot of responsibility for an eight-year-old! So I want to make sure you really know what you’re getting yourself into, and I also want to answer any questions you might have. So my first question back to you is this: Why do you want to be baptized?

Breslen: Because Jesus did it as an example, and so that we can repent.

Bishop: You’ve learned your primary lessons very well, but of course given your age I don’t think you’d have much of anything to repent of.

Breslen: [laughing] Well I hope nothing too serious!

Bishop: I’m sure you’re fine. So what baptismal date are you thinking about?

Breslen: On my birthday, the fifth of March.

Bishop [looking at a calendar on his wall]: Well that’s a Monday; you should be having your Family Home Evening that night. Can we shoot for the weekend?

Breslen [handing the bishop her own calendar]: Actually March 5 is a Sunday. See?

Bishop: OK, but this is a calendar from 2028.

Breslen: That’s right, Bishop.

Bishop: But that’s 10 years away – you’ll be 18!

Breslen: Yep, that’s when I’d like to be baptized.

Bishop: Wow; that would be a long time to wait! We might want to talk about the Gift of the Holy Ghost. Do you know what that is?

Breslen: Yep, it’s what helps you know what’s right and what’s wrong.

Bishop: Exactly. Without it, how else will you be able to deal with all of the tough decisions you’re going to have to face as you grow up?

Breslen. Well, I guess I’m having trouble understanding that too. But Mierren really wanted the Gift of the Holy Ghost too, and she was told she has to wait until she’s 18 to get it.

Bishop: Well, Mierren’s in a different situation than you are.

Breslen: Yes, I know; she said you told her not to come back to church at all until after she’s 18.

Bishop: Well, that’s not exactly how I put it.

Breslen: But she showed me the talk you printed out for her, and it said primary isn’t the best place for her – she said she won’t even be able to go to Young Womens when she’s older. By the time she’s allowed to go, she’ll be an adult and will have to join the belief society!

Bishop: [chuckling] That’s RElief Society, Breslen.

Breslen: Ok, sorry, but I saw one of their meetings through the window once and it looked really, really boring.

Bishop: Well, I know that sounds a little harsh right now, but you never know, things might change in the meantime.

Breslen: But the talk came from an apostle, and he said the prophet got a belevation right from God that she shouldn’t be going to primary – do you think God will change His mind soon?

Bishop: Well REVelations aren’t something we can all understand, so that’s a really hard question to answer; you just need to understand that things are very confusing for Mierren right now.

Breslen: They sure are, but Sister Robinson taught us in primary that when people are confused they just need to Follow the Prophet like it says in the song. She said if the prophet says something, then it’s the same thing as if Jesus said it right to my face with his own lips. So does Jesus think Mierren shouldn’t go to primary either?

Bishop: I – uh – I really don’t know; we’ll just have to sort things out with her separately. Remember, we’re here to talk about you right now.

Breslen: Well, I guess I should be confused too then, because I think Mierren and I are pretty much the same – we’re such good friends, sometimes we think maybe should have been twins!

Bishop: No, no, no…you’re in a completely different situation.

Breslen: Is it because of what the apostle said about her parents?

Bishop: What was that?

Breslen: That they are guilty of really, really griebous sins? I’m not sure what griebous means…

Bishop: I think you mean grievous…

Breslen: Oh, well that sounds really bad! General Grievous always scared me when I was little, so –

Bishop: [interupting] I hope you understand that I can’t talk to you about her parents.

Breslen: OK, I guess that’s fine, but it makes me sad not to have her there in primary.

Bishop: We’re all sad about it too.

Breslen: Yes, I know. My mom was helping Sister Robinson last week, and she had to fix up all of the name tags on the classroom doors. She didn’t see me, but I could tell she was crying when she took down Mierren’s name. I know it was hard for her, but she obeyed anyway.

Bishop: She’s a good example to you, isn’t she?

Breslen: Well, when I saw her take the name tag down, I took mine off too. I decided that I want to spend my Sunday mornings at Mierren’s house singing our favourite primary songs together so she won’t have to be alone. Then we can both come back together – when we’re 18!

Bishop: But that would make your parents and your teachers very sad. Think of what you’ll be missing!

Breslen: I did think of that – which is why I was so happy when the apostle said she would be ok.

Bishop: He said that?

Breslen: I think so. He said if we wait until we’re 18 to start coming to church we wouldn’t lose anything.

Bishop: But Breslen, think about how you’ll miss out on primary, youth conference, temple trips…

Breslen: I don’t know how we would get that back, but that’s what he said, and Sister Robinson said an apostle is a prophet too. So he must know what he’s talking about – especially if he can talk for Jesus!

Bishop: But it wouldn’t be the same for you.

Breslen: Why not? My parents are sinners too.

Bishop: No, no, no! Your parents aren’t guilty of nearly the same level of sin as Mierren’s parents.

Breslen: What did they do that was so bad?

Bishop: Well just so we can move on, I’ll let you know that we told her mom not marry her partner, and they directly disobeyed us by doing it anyway. That’s called apostasy!

Breslen: But Mierren didn’t do anything wrong!

Bishop: That may be true, but she lives with them, so she would be really confused – like the apostle said, she would learn one thing in primary and something different at home. We really wouldn’t want her to have to live with such a tough conflict.

Breslen: Well sometimes I get confused too – my dad went through the drive-through after church last Sunday, but my primary teacher said that’s a sin.

Bishop: You don’t have to worry about that sort of thing, Breslen; besides, I know your dad, and he’s a good, faithful priesthood holder.

Breslen: Well I might get in trouble for saying this, but we were at the mall the other day, and I looked over at dad while we passed the lacy underwear store. [whispering] I saw him look over at the posters. We learned from Sister Johnson in primary that Jesus said if you look at girls in their underwear it’s called adulterizing or something like that. Is that something serious?

Bishop: [clearing his throat] Well, maybe he should just look away next time.

Breslen: But what about the other girls in my primary class? Paula’s dad is always up there talking about himself in testimony meeting. He goes on and on. Sister Johnson said it’s called “pride” when someone just loves to hear themselves talk. And Jesus said pride is a really bad sin.

Bishop: Well I guess that’s true, but it’s not really on the same scale.

Breslen: My grandpa said when he was a missionary in Germany he baptized people whose parents were Nazis. We saw a movie about that in school once, and they must have done some pretty grievous things.

Bishop: I can’t really say…

Breslen: And Julie’s dad comes to that group here on Tuesdays where everyone’s addicted to something – are they sinners?

Bishop: No, no, they’re trying to fix things.

Breslen: Audrey told me her dad hits her when she’s bad…and I heard Brittany’s dad molested her cousin. What does mol –

Bishop [getting agitated]: I’m sorry, the things they share with me are confidential, so I can’t really say anything about that.

Breslen: Oh, and Holly lives with her mom ‘cause her stepdad’s in jail – something about a gang.

Bishop: Ok, I think that’s enough examples.

Breslen: But their kids all get to come to primary – why is Mierren so different?

Bishop: Because the prophet said so, that’s why. Don’t you remember your primary songs?

Breslen: I guess so. Maybe it will get easier to say my testimony about him out loud when I get old like you…

Bishop: I’m not that…

Breslen: Sorry, I mean older. But it must be easier for you ‘cause my dad said you posted your support for the policy on your Facebook page right away.

Bishop: That’s right, I follow the prophet 100%. Sometimes you just have to trust him, even if things don’t make sense.

Breslen: Even if you have to tell a kid like Mierren she’s not welcome here?

Bishop: Well I wouldn’t say it like that.

Breslen: But that’s what she told me she heard. Can’t a prophet make a mistake sometimes?

Bishop: Not this time, I’m afraid.

Breslen: But I really don’t get it. My Mom told me one of her friends in school back in Utah had three moms – that’s even more than Mierren – and she said kids would call her and her brother plygs.

Bishop: Well that’s something completely different.

Breslen: Maybe so, but Mom told us we should always stand up for someone if they’re getting called names. I don’t know what a plyg is but it sounds like pig so I don’t think it’s very nice.

Bishop: You’re right about that.

Breslen: Well, when Mierren found out she won’t be able to come to church anymore, the other kids were teasing her because Emma’s brother told her the policy is good riddance – because it only affects children of really bad sinners – grievous ones, whatever that is.

Bishop: Let’s just say serious instead, ok?

Breslen: OK, but Sister Johnson had written “I am a child of God” after everyone’s name on the white board last week. And before she came into the classroom, Emma crossed out “Child of God” and wrote “Child of Grievous Sinners” after Mierren’s name.

Bishop: Well that’s not very nice!

Breslen: But then the boys decided to shorten it up to C.O.G.S. so Sister Johnson wouldn’t know what we were laughing about – and so they wouldn’t get in trouble.

Bishop: I’ll have to talk to them about that in our next interview.

Breslen: Well Mierren and I were talking, and we decided that we’re all COGS; I’d never want to let her down, so I wrote it next to my name too so she wouldn’t feel alone.

Bishop: I see; well I’m sure your mom is proud of you for being brave enough to stand up for her.

Breslen: When we learned about bullying in school, my teacher said if someone is making fun of you for something, sometimes it’s better to go along with it than to get all upset about it. That’s what they want after all – to make you upset.

Bishop: I guess that makes sense.

Breslen: Well, Mierren and I decided not to get upset and have some fun with it instead. So we erased the word COGS and drew a gear with cogs next to our names so that everyone would know that we’re the same.

Bishop: I guess that explains your dress, then.

Breslen: Yep, when we were playing at her house, we found some special fabric pens and decided to draw them on our dresses – and we’re proud to wear them together.

Bishop: Listen, our time is up, but I’m proud of you for sharing your thoughts and questions me. It doesn’t sound like we’ll be able to finish this tonight; so maybe the best thing to do is for you to go home and pray about it before you make a final decision.

Breslen: [standing] OK, I can do that.

Bishop: Great! I hope you get a good feeling about it, but we’ll still have to do some paperwork. Here is the form you’ll need for your certificate if you get a warm answer to your prayer. All I need is your parents’ signature and we can schedule it.

Breslen: Thanks Bishop!

[After hugs and handshakes, everyone leaves the meetinghouse to travel home.]

[Scene 2: Simmons family dinner table.]

Breslen: So, dad, did I do good in the interview?

Brother Simmons: Yes, I was very proud of you.

Breslen: Well I’ve thought it through and I think the bishop is right. I should just go ahead and get baptized. Like the Bishop said, though, he can’t schedule it until you sign this form saying you’re ok letting me get baptized.

Brother Simmons: Well, you’ve given me some things to think about.

Breslen: OK, but I prayed about it and it felt really good when I thought about wearing my special baptism dress that mom made for me. So I’ve made up my mind. Here’s a pen.

Brother Simmons: [reluctantly taking the pen from Breslen] Like I said, maybe we should talk it through a little more first.

Breslen: Come on dad, just do it!

Brother Simmons: ____[Fill in the blank]_____.

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OK, so that’s the end of this play. And again, this is another “choose your own ending” story. There are only a few characters to choose from in this one, but if Nathan told you, “you are that dad!” how would you finish this story? Would you:

Sign it and forget about Mierren. [Tell Breslen, “You can’t let a rule that doesn’t directly affect you hinder your own progress.”]
Refuse to sign it. [Tell Breslen, “I’m going to take a stand and ask you to wait to be baptized until Mierren can be baptized, too.”]
Stall until you figure out where you stand. [If you wait long enough, the policy might change. Then you can say, “I never agreed with that policy to begin with, but I didn’t want to cause a stir at the time.”]

As Dr. Seuss asks:

“What would you do?
What would you do,
if your [daughter] asked you?”

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| Next: Chapter 2 Part 2: Uninvited |